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Tax Plan for Your 2018 Taxes

Enclosed is my 2018 Form 1040, together with payment. Please take note of the attached article from “USA Today” archives. In the article, you will note that the Pentagon paid $171.50 each for hammers and NASA paid $600.00 each for toilet seats Please find...
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Politics

Little Johnny came home from school one day and said to his father “Dad,what can you tell me about politics? I have to learn about it for school tomorrow.” The father thought some and said, “Okay, son . The best way I can describe politics is to use...
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Albert Einstein

Three men die and are waiting at the Pearly Gates when St. Peter tells them that there will be a slight delay but not to worry that he will have Albert Einstein visit with them during their wait. Albert arrives and introduces himself to the first man and asks,...
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Official Announcement

The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from an Eagle to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government’s political stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of...
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Agriculture Politics

TO: Honorable Secretary of Agriculture Washington, D.C. Dear Sir, My friend, Bubba Peterson, over at Alexandria, LA, received a check for $1,000 from the government for not raising hogs. So, I want to go into the “not raising hogs” business next year. What...
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Competitive Politics

A couple of opposing candidates for county office happened to be sitting next to each other in the local diner. One turned to the other and said, “You know why I’m going to win this election? Because of my ‘personal touch.’ For example, I...
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Snail Jokes

A man goes to a Halloween party with a woman on his back. The host asks him, “And what are you?”The man says, “I’m a snail.”The host says, “And who’s that on your back?”And the man says, “That’s Michelle!”...
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Civics Test

If you find twenty dollars lying in the middle of the road, would you: (A. Give it to an honest lawyer,(B. Give it to an honest politician,(C. Keep it. The correct answer is: (C. Keep it because there’s no such thing as an honest lawyer or an honest...
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Cannibal Jokes

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other, “Does this taste funny to you?” That reminds me of the cannibal that passed his friend in the woods….. When do cannibals leave the table? When everyone’s eaten……. What is a...
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BP Oil Spill Jokes

BP Oil Spill Jokes Late-Night Jokes About the BP Oil Spill Disaster in the GulfBy Daniel Kurtzman, About.com Guidehttp://politicalhumor.about.com/od/currentevents/a/oil-spill-jokes.htm “The BP president said yesterday that the company would survive. That’s...
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Honeymoon is Over

Honeymoon is Over Here are the key indicators of when the honeymoon period has finished. 1. Addictions Before: You tell her you don’t mind the occasional cold beer on a hot day with your mates, and that you’ve taken recreational drugs but those days are...
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Men Talk

Men Talk How to talk about men and still be politically correct… He does not have a beer gut; he has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY. He is not quiet; he is a CONVERSATIONAL MINIMALIST. He is not stupid; he suffers from MINIMAL CRANIAL DEVELOPMENT. He...
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Questions from Arizona

Question from Arizona Let me see if I got this right!!! If you cross the north Korean border illegally you get 12 years hard Labor. If you cross the Iranian border illegally you are detained indefinitely. If you cross the Afghan border illegally, you get shot. If you...
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New Position

New Position A happy couple went on a cruise for their honeymoon. The couple’s conversation headed towards political and international events. The husband asked, “Honey. What do you think about the Middle East position.” His wife replied, “I...
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