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The Fish

A priest takes a walk to the pier near his church. He stops to watch a fisherman loading his boat. The fisherman notices, and asks the priest if he would like to join him for a couple of hours. The priest agrees. The fisherman asks if the priest has ever fished before, to which the priest says no. He baits the hook for him and says, “Give it a shot father”. After a few minutes, the priest hooks a big fish and struggles to get it in the boat.

The fisherman says “Whoa, what a big sonofabitch!” Priest: “Uh, please sir, can you mind your language?” Fisherman: (THINKING QUICKLY) “I’m sorry Father, but that’s what this fish is called – a sonofabitch!” Priest: “Oh, I’m sorry – I didn’t know.”

After the trip, the priest brings the fish to the church and spots the bishop. Priest: “Eminence, look at this big sonofabitch!” Bishop: “Please Father, mind your language, this is a house of God.” Priest: “No, you don’t understand – that’s what this fish is called, and I caught it. I caught this sonofabitch!” Bishop: “Hmmm. You know, I could clean this sonofabitch and we could have it for dinner.”

So the Bishop takes the fish and cleans it, and brings it to Mother Superior at the convent. Bishop: “Mother Superior could you cook this sonofabitch for dinner tonight?” Mother Superior: “My Lord, what language!” Bishop: “No, Sister, that’s what the fish is called – a sonofabitch! Father caught it, I cleaned it, and we’d like you to cook it.” Mother Superior: “Hmmm. Yes, I’ll cook that sonofabitch tonight.”

Well, the fisherman stops by for dinner with the three of them, and they all think the fish is great. Priest: “I caught the sonofabitch!” Bishop: “And I cleaned the sonofabitch!” Mother Superior: And I cooked the sonofabitch!” The fisherman stares at them for a minute with a steely gaze, but then takes off his hat, puts his feet up on the table, and says, “You know, you all are alright”.