Fillings

A little boy was taken to the dentist.It was discovered that he had a cavity that would have to be filled.”Now, young man,” asked the dentist, “what kind of filling would you like for that tooth?””Chocolate, please,” replied the...

Top 10 Reasons Eve was Created

10. God worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the garden because he would not ask for directions.9. God knew that Adam would one day require someone to locate and hand him the TV remote.8. God knew that Adam would never go out and get himself a new fig...

Filling

A little boy was taken to the dentist.It was discovered that he had a cavity that would have to be filled.”Now, young man,” asked the dentist, “what kind of filling would you like for that tooth?””Chocolate, please,” replied the...

The Top Ten Men!

The Top Ten Men!1. The Doctor because he says, “Take off your clothes”2. The Dentist because he says, “Open Wide”3. The hairdresser because he says, “Do you want it teased or blown”4. The Milkman because he says, “Do you want...

What a Difference a Century Makes!

What a Difference a Century Makes!THE YEAR 1905Maybe this will boggle your mind, I know it did mine! The year is 1905, one hundred years ago. What a difference a century makes!Here are some of the U.S. statistics for 1905: The average life expectancy in the U.S. was...

Signs Everywhere

Signs EverywhereSign on A shop window: “Open most days at about 9 or 10, occasionally as early as 7, but some days as late as 12 or 1. We close at about 4 or 5, but sometimes as late as 11 or 12. Some days we aren’t here at all, and lately I have been here...

Do it!

Do it!Accountants do it with Double EntryAcupuncturists do it with a small prickAmbulance drivers come quickerAnd Last, But Not Least…Australians do it Down UnderBankers do it with interest, but…Bartenders do it on the rocksChess players check their...

Last Name

A local law enforcement officer stopped a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he was in a good mood that day he decided to give the poor fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. So, he asks the man his...

First Night

First NightThe wedding date was set and the grooms three pals- a carpenter, an electrician, and a dentist- were deciding what pranks to play on the couple on their wedding night.The carpenter decided that he would saw the slats off their bed.The electrician figured...

Stupid Questions and Equivalent Answers

10 stupid questions people usually ask in obvious situations and some equally stupid answers:-1 At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends Stupid Question: Hey, what are you doing here?Answer: Well, it’s so hot, there were no cool cabs so I thought...

My Acheing Tooth

A woman and her husband interrupted their vacation to go to the dentist. “I want a tooth pulled, and I don’t want Novocain because I’m in a big hurry,” the woman said. “Just extract the tooth as quickly as possible, and we’ll be on...

AWOL

As the sun rose over Parris Island, the senior drill instructor realized that one of his recruits had gone AWOL ( Absent WithOut Leave ). A search party was dispatched immediately. After a few hours the recruit was discovered hiding in some bushes. He was sent back to...

Meet Bubba’s Family!

Meet Bubba’s Family!Hi y’all…muh name id’s Bubba and dis is muh fameily: Furst is me… Mom said I got all the good looks and no brains. I love being a babe hound. Girls make spit roll down my chin. I have a stomach problem and fart alot....

Boat Names

Boat NamesFor those lucky people who are going to buy a boat this Summer, here are some suggested names …Pier PressureBerth ControlSea NileVitamin SeaSeas the MomentTooth Ferry (great for dentists)Nauti By NatureMaster Baiter

Quickies II

Quickies IITwo Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft it sank-proving once and for all that you can’t have your kayak and heat it, too.* * * * * * Two boll weevils grew up in South Carolina. One went to Hollywood and became...

Jobs

JobsThree women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their love lives.One woman said, “I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does.”The second woman giggled and confessed, “I call my husband the miner...

Men and Women

Men and Women1. EATING OUT:When the bill arrives, men will each throw in a $20, even though the bill is only for $22.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and no one will actually admit they want change back. When thegirls get their bill, out come the pocket...

Favorite Hymns

Favorite HymnsThe Dentist’s Hymn: Crown Him With Many CrownsThe Weatherman’s Hymn: There Shall Be Showers of BlessingsThe Contractor’s Hymn: The Church’s One FoundationThe Tailor’s Hymn: Holy, Holy, HolyThe Golfer’s Hymn: There is a...

The Dental Appointment

The Dental AppointmentOne day a man walks into a dentist’s office and asks how much it will cost to extract wisdom teeth.”Eighty dollars,” the dentist says.”That’s a ridiculous amount,” the man says. “Isn’t there a...
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