Marriage, Men, Sex, Women
1. When I was born, I was given a choice – a big pecker or a good memory…. I don’t remember what I chose. 2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. 3. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects. 4....
Doctors, Lawyers, Students, Women
Rachel and Esther meet for the first time in fifty years since high school.Rachel begins to tell Esther about her children. “My son is a doctor and he’s got four kids. My daughter is married to a lawyer and they have three great kids. So tell me Esther,...
Animals, Dogs, Religion, Women
God created the donkey and said to him: “You will work unceasingly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence and you will live 50 years.You will be a donkey.”The donkey answered: “I will...
Animals, Business, Computers, Fishing, Religion, Students, Women
Before you read to the end, does anybody know what the main ingredient of WD-40 is? Don’t lie and don’t cheat.Who knew; I had a neighbor who bought a new pickup. I got up very early one Sunday morning and saw that someone had spray painted red all around...
Dogs, Drinking, One Liners, Women
12. Hey, wasn’t your daughter a porn queen?11. I’m surprised you stopped me, Dunkin Donuts has a 3 for 1 special!10. If I bend over, will I still get a ticket?9. No, offi, offic, lucifer . . . I’m not as think you are drunk I am. I swear to dog.8....
Doctors, Men, Nurses, Patients, Women
A man approached his family physician and said, “Doc, I’m afraid you’ll have to remove my wife’s tonsils one of these days.” The doctor pulled out the family’s medical file and exclaimed, “Why, I removed them six years ago!...
Food, Football, Sports, Women
Morris was in his usual place in the morning sitting at the table, reading the paper after breakfast. He came across an article about a beautiful actress that was about to marry a football player who was known primarily for his lack of IQ and common sense.He turned to...
Business, Doctors, Marriage, Men, Religion, Songs, Teachers, Women
The girl who was a wall flower at the dance, but a dandelion in the grass?The drive in theater manager who decided if business got any better he would start showing movies?The two Arabs who sat under a palm tree eating their dates?The recent survey on cigarettes which...